A relationship is like a plant. It needs constant care and nourishment to thrive and blossom. Take it for granted, and it will fade over time. One powerful way to keep the connection alive is by understanding and practicing each other’s love languages. Let’s dive deeper into this!

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What is Love Language?

This concept was introduced by Dr. Gary Chapman in 1992 through his book, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. This idea suggests how each person has different ways of expressing love and their preference on how to accept love. Identifying your love language and your mates will help you find more effective ways to show compassion for each other, which eventually strengthens the bond and boosts the sparks between you two.

Over the years, many scientists have performed various research to prove this theory. Some focus on one theory to be more specific and accurate. Interestingly, almost all of these studies resulted positively. Even more than that, this theory of five may also work for other types of meaningful relationships, such as friendship and family.

The Five Love Languages

While each person may have more specific preferences, love languages can be categorized into five. Here they are, each explained in detail with examples to help you understand better.

1. Words of Affirmation

Words can mean the world when spoken to the right people, like those whose love language is words of affirmation. Compliments, encouragements, and even simple kind greetings will sound like an affirmation of the person’s value. If your partner is this type, saying ‘I love you’ and other sweet sentences every once in a while will make them deeply understand how meaningful they are in your heart. Besides saying it verbally, you can also do it in writing or text.

Maybe it is not always sweet words, like what we can see on Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds. Dubbed as couple goals by many, the duo mostly use words of banter and teasing to express their love. The captions they write on social media when posting about each other mostly come in the form of witty humor. It is cute and unique, but we can tell how strongly they are connected.

2. Acts of Service

For some people, actions may speak louder than words. This love language focuses on doing things for your partner to show care, such as massaging their shoulder after back from work, preparing their breakfast on Sunday morning, or a simple gesture like washing a cup. Acts of service reflect how much you understand your partner’s needs and your willingness to make an effort for them.

The acts of service seem to be one of the things that nurture the love between David and Victoria Beckham. Ever since the beginning of their romance, they have been supporting each other’s careers. Several times the famous football athlete served as his wife’s muse for her fashion brand. This couple even made a headline where he carried her on his back out of her birthday party because she had a foot injury.

3. Receiving Gifts

Receiving gifts does not mean in a materialistic way. On the contrary, even small little things can be the greatest love expression for people with this love language. Imagine a pair or … The key value lies in the thoughtfulness and effort behind the gift.

Take a look at Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. From being a lovebird in the Scooby Doo movie in 2002, the Fred and Daphne actors have been a solid couple in real life up until today. In one interview, the actor clearly stated how he never expects to receive anything, but he loves to receive small things she gives him because she always knows what he would like. There was a time when she gave him a self-watering Lettuce Grow because he likes having fresh vegetables growing at their home.

4. Quality Time

Time is limited, making it a valuable thing for the people you cherish the most. Undivided attention to enjoying the moment together can be the best thing someone can hope for from their mate. Some couples may prefer simple activities like chatting over a cup of coffee in their living room, while some might wish for an adventure like hiking. Being present for each other is a blessing for people with this love language.

Being incredibly famous and busy, quality time becomes something that Tom Holland and Zendaya treasure the most from each other. The couple loves to tag along on each other’s events, simply to enjoy the euphoria of each other’s big moments. Many times they make headlines for wearing matching outfits when spending time together, showing how much they invest their thoughts into their quality time.

5. Physical Touch

Biologically speaking, a physical touch can trigger our brain to release oxytocin, a hormone that makes us feel loved and warm. The level of cortisol, a.k.a stress hormone, will decrease as well. Therefore, it makes sense how people find physical touch with their mates substantial to nurture their relationship. Needless to say, physical touches don’t always have to be sexual. A forehead kiss, holding hands, and a pat on the back also count as a meaningful expression of love.

We can look at Zoe Kravitz and Channing Tatum as an example of how physical touch can be an effective love language. The pair is often seen holding hands, embracing, and even staring at each other with admiration and grace. There was even a time when the actor posted a picture of Kravitz taking naps on his lap, reflecting on how much he treasures this experience.

Finding The Love Language in Your Relationship

Now, what if we are not sure of what is our love language and what is our partner’s? Take it as a couple challenge, and follow these tips to identify the expression method that works the best for you and your mate.

1. Communicate

Start by talking to your partner about your willingness to explore the love language in your relationship. Next, you can continue the discussion on what could be your love language, and what your partner could be. Later on, both of you will do several tips below. Make sure to communicate again every time you find some insights about this matter.

2. Reflect Your Experiences

Ask yourself each of these questions below. The answers are most likely the reflection of how your mind works. After you finish, redo the same exercise from your mate’s perspective.

What actions have you ever done for the people you love?
What actions of your partner that make you feel loved the most?
What are the requests and expectations you have for your partner?
What complaints have you ever given your partner regarding their lack of action?

3. Try Online Quiz

There are many quizzes on the internet about “What is Your Love Language”. While those quizzes might not always deliver accurate results, they are still worth trying. Taking some of those tests may help you gather insights about what possible love expressions you prefer the most. It can also be a fun activity to do together casually.

4. Experiment Together

Still unsure of which language is your favorite? Then try it one by one with your partner. Give it a week for each love language and do several things in that specific language to see how you feel about it. After five weeks of experimenting, try having a heart-to-heart communication again to review what the two of you have experienced.

5. Do It on A Staycation

Exploring love language is an investment in your relationship. Hence, it makes sense to do it in the most romantic environment. You can decorate your room with flowers or book a beautiful hotel for a short staycation. If you are too busy for a full-night stay, you can always book hotel rooms at hourly rates on Flow at any time both of you can spare.

6. Open for Possibilities

Do you know that one person can have more than one love language? Or that two people in a relationship may have different preferences regarding their expression of love? It is also possible that you might have a change of heart in the future, which results in changing your methods of expressing feelings. There is so much room to grow and find something new in a romantic bond, so keep your mind open to it.

Conclusion

The concept of Love Language has been proven effective in helping people maintain a spark in their relationship and even strengthen the connection between them. We can see how couples with healthy bonds always have their ways of nurturing their love. Hence, it is time for us to start exploring and implementing this concept in our romantic lives.

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